‘We might be through with the past, but the past ain’t through with us.’
– from the film Magnolia Directed & written by Paul Thomas Anderson.
Remember
The moon
a memory of the sun
a single coal
that didn’t burn itself out
skin silvered
brittle as a frozen web
heart remains midnight
a moth patters against the ceiling
sounds the beginning of rain
an ancient butterfly
lost in the night
searching for the scent
of the sun given off
by the battered moon
its showers of dust
the softest of pinpricks
the ghost of spin drift
the shore remembers
every footstep
an old photograph
folded and faded
creased and crumpled
your touch quiet as
paws on the piano
searching for the colours
grouting your fingerprints
sometimes the sun
floods it folds
blinding as footprints
brimming with silver
sometimes the moon is
brighter than the sun
I seem to be a little preoccupied with memories and remembering at the moment, as I attempt to learn from and re-evaluate my past. I’m amazed by how majority of the time I am unaware of how my past influences and shapes my future, for good and bad. I am learning to come to terms with this.
Come the end I want to have regrets, it means things mattered and that sometimes somethings are too beautiful to risk disturbing? It would mean I spent my life learning how to swallow the fear, trying to find the courage, striving to do better. I wonder are the only regrets that truly matter, I could have loved harder and I could have been kinder?
I have some more contemplating to do.
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